Any one who wants to nationalise Model railways wins it for me !

Farage has framed this as "the people v the establishment". Yet The Times story that caused all this was about George Cottrell, a man who's family is full of nobility and links to the Royal Family.

Hopefully the Monster Raving Loony Party won’t stand, as that would split the sensible vote, thus allowing the establishment public school multimillionaire candidate to win, and that’s surely what we all agree must be avoided at all costs…

Of course I'd tell people not to vote for me. However, it looks like there are now more candidates than there are seats, so no automatic appointment to parliament, and therefore no need for me (whew!)

You could vote for the Count Spit! He has some good policies; my favourite is pegging the price of croissants, a staple for us old yuppies ...

Other than Ronan, the only sensible option would be a well known local who would promise to spend time looking after constituents' problems.

I would be pissed off if I lived in clacton and supported one of the other party's that wont stand. Surely standing is a way of getting rid of Farage..

Ledd - you make a good point, but some may argue that many footballers spend quite a lot of time waiting for someone else to take a throw in or a free kick, they get a 15 minutes break after 45 minutes of sideways and backwards ball play, and if they look a bit tired, they get subbed off for a rest - probably a bit swings and roundabouts.

So Farage's only metric for success will be if he actually gets more votes than in GE. Good luck with that in peak holiday season!

Ironically the Swiss match was so boring I turned over and watched the tennis which was much better

Yay Ronan, but will you tell everyone not to vote for you?

5 hrs 15 mins ! Tennis is as boring as the Swiss v Columbia match last night.

In a tennis match the ball is in play for about 10% to 20% of the time. So a match lasting 5 hours 15 minutes would have a similar ball in play time as a football match.

That's the 2nd contrived By election within a month.

So it’s the Count vs the C*unt… I’ve heard of cunning stunts, but this is another level!!

or Count, for Prestons Womble, a4e and OI

The main parties sensibly don't want to play the role of extras in the Nige "I don't have a abide by any rules" sideshow. So it's Vount Binface v Nige.

Currently thinking of standing for election in Clacton ;-)

Townsend's half-brother played for the real Dons before his tragic early death - scored a great equaliser at QPR in the Youth Cup last minute

Talking of Franchise, just back from Cobham 6 Colliers Wood United (mostly trialists ) 0 - a disappointing night exacerbated by the presence of the MK Dons record appearance holder (apparently involved in the Cobham coaching set up)

Most of the Swiss penalties were able to Nestle in the back of the net

Andros Townsend who played for MK on loan called them Franchise.

Thanks

Djokovic wins the longest quarter-final in Wimbledon history at 5 hours and 15 minutes, and has to play Sinner in a couple of days time - these footballers don’t realise how lucky they are…

Yep.